But I feel like I have handled this whole miscarriage better than the BFN's I usually get on a normal cycle. Don't get me wrong, I was a mess last week, but I think that I'm ok. And I'm just ready to move forward. It didn't seem to take me as long to accept it this time and I wonder if it is partly because I kept telling myself out of all the months, this month I felt it the least. I think that it didn't hurt that I had so much support from my WebMd friends.
My husband missed one of the meetings at the fire station when he took me to the ER and we saw the Assistant Chief yesterday and he asked me if I was ok. At first, I didn't know why he was asking so I was like, Yeah I'm fine. Then he said, "Are you sure cause W said he had to take you to the ER." Before I knew what I was doing I just blurted out, "I had a miscarriage." I never would have shared this type of info with anyone other than the board. I still don't know why I did, but in my heart I felt like saying it lifted something off my shoulders. When I told my DH about it, he was kind of surprised I said something too cause I usually try to keep it private. Like I said before, this has been one of them times that just seem Surreal and like it didn't really happen so it made it easier to accept. One of them times that someone might have gotten away with saying something like, "It wasn't meant to be" and I might not wanted to punch them as bad... :)
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